Law & Linguistics

Cindy from Central NC and Her Family

This is not another pro-life or pro-choice argument. The purpose of this entry is to warn a woman who is unable to carry her own baby or a gay couple against obtaining a gestational mother for their child. The reason the word “abortion” is part of the title is that the rate abortion greatly diminishes the availability of children for adoption. In turn, this may influence a person’s decision to seek the service of a gestational mother.

Since the mid 1970s, children relinquished for adoption have declined from nearly 9 percent to under 1 percent of births to never-married women. This decline could result from the legalization of abortion, the social acceptance of single mother, or the financial ability of single mothers to support their children. Regardless of the cause, the availability of children for adoption in American has become “virtually nonexistent.”

Because of the lack of children available in the U.S. for adoption, many people have adopted foreign children. Others simply disregard foreign adoption and turn to assisted reproduction because the cost of adopting a foreign child can be as costly as using a gestational mother, not to mention the benefit of “creating” one’s own child. What most people need to know when considering whether to use the service of a gestational mother is that adoption law is much more settled than laws regarding the right of parents when the “intended parents” are not carrying their own babies. The law surrounding assisted reproduction is lagging behind the advancement of medical capabilities. Therefore, the law does not provide the same legal protection to intended parents as it would to adopted parents.

The most important thing to worry about is the danger of a breach—that is, the gestational mother’s unwillingness to give up the baby after she cared for the baby for more than nine months. Parting with someone that has been with you for more than nine months is not easy, regardless of whether it was your baby, your friend, or your pet. Even though this would upset the intended parents, one can hardly blame the gestational mother. Even if the parents (both intended and gestational) live in a state where the law in this area is somewhat established, the gestational mother can always run to a state where gestational mothers are deemed the legal mother.

In the end, those who want children can spend more money than anticipated because not only they would have to pay for the expensive medical procedures but also for the cost of litigation. They also have to pay for the pain and headache of disappointment. Thus, please bless the world and its abandoned children and seriously consider adoption, here or overseas.

Sources: http://www.childwelfare.gov/pubs/s_place.pdf, http://www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/series/sr_23/sr23_027.pdf

Law abortion, adoption, children, family law, gay, litigation, parents, surrogacy